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  1. 14 points
    Applying to Join the Black Knights STEP 1: Apply to join our alliance in-game Make sure you do this, because the system will literally not let you apply before you do. STEP 2: Have a forum account Once again, the system will not let you apply before you have made an account here. STEP 3: APPLY HERE That is Tibernet, our application system. It will make sure you are eligible to apply, and then will post your application into this forum, as you, which is why you must have a forum account to apply. STEP 4: Join our Discord server Ping the Interrogation Squad role in the #public channel on our Discord server, and we'll get you set up to proceed with the application. All communications will be done via text chat. Voice chat will not be used. STEP 5: Participate in the applicants channel (#interrogation) As some point, either government members or IA staff will chat with you in #interrogation. This is basically just us making sure you are cool enough to be in our extremely cool alliance, so it can get random. Obviously we don't expect you to be online 24/7, but the more active you are there, and better chance you have at being accepted. Also Protip: Stay on the color beige for as long as possible.
  2. 11 points
    Yosodog

    The Public BK Shitlist

    The following leaders are hereby placed on the Public BK Shitlist for crimes against BK or general idiocy. All leaders placed on this list are hereby barred from joining The Black Knights and we will give warning any future alliance they seek to join. Any alliance that accepts one of the following leaders will lose respect from BK. The only way to be added or removed from this list is with approval from the Emperor. Jemm (AKA Jimmyboy) - Failure to meet standards, disobedience, called us "too gay" for him Jaguar - Failure to fight in a war, left BK too many times, implied we're not serious, an absolute complete dumb ass Rahul - Disobedience Kastor - Being Kastor, to keep our bank safe Mitch666 - Occasional Douchebag, being Mitch. Gabby - Gee...I wonder why? Quasar - Left BK too many times, constant pedo comments despite requests to stop hidude45454 - Pixel hugger, put himself over BK El Commander - 3ego5me Keksalot - lol Youislove - Deserter during BKExit war Holton - Left without notice while holding high-level job, suspected spy, tried to pull this shit. Anneal - Disobedience, attempting to circumvent authority, and just being a huge prick. John Smith - Posting private conversations with BK members on the OWF without their consent, attention seeking on the OWF in a particularly douchey way. DukeofNavies - Embezzling war aid for baseball. Noctis - Leaking Gorge - Embezzling funds from bank AA and pretending it was deleted Curufinwe - Crimes against BK, two-faced douchecanoe Who Me - Crimes against BK, two-faced douchecanoe Seeker - When you say something this fucking stupid, obviously you don't pass our intelligence test. hadesflames - OOC attacks, breaking peace terms, unlikeable douchebag Leo the Great/The Mad Titan/Aragorn - Crimes against BK, making shit up, breaking every core tenant BK was founded on, Strum wannabe, Roq's bitch Roquentin - Crimes against BK, strong inferiority complex, general pain in the ass MIKO/Horny/Bashir Al-Assad/Copypaste/bj1905 - Multis, suspected spy, generally an annoying piece of shit Camelot (Alliance) - Stealing code from BK Net Rothschild Family (Alliance) - Stealing code from BK Net Blackbird - Stealing code from BK Net and selling it
  3. 6 points
    Tiber

    Join BK...?

    Okay...these replies are unnecessarily hostile. You know I was salty about you leaving, but I didn't really hold it against you that much, and idk why everyone else is. However, asking us to stop telling you to join BK was pretty dumb for a couple different reasons: The "Join BK" is basically an alliance joke. Hooves had to deal with tons of "Join BK"s after he left, and as far as I could tell, it was always just a friendly joke coming from the fact that we did indeed want him to rejoin BK. You know this alliance, and you still came here and told us NOT to do something. This is obviously going to make everyone do it. So yeah, I both disagree with the hostility towards you, and with the original post.
  4. 6 points
    Shifty Stranger

    How AA's grow on you

    When you first start out on any AA, you question what you're doing. Like you're like wtf, why is there so much devotion being asked of me. Eventually you get to know everyone better and understand that certain quirks belong to different people. Again we're more than just our avatars though avatars do play a role in how we perceive each other. Like Yoso is more agreeable because of doge, while Strum appears to look like he just goes "kek" and skitters away because his avatar is a robot without legs. Anyway, eventually logging in everyday becomes less like damn it why do all alliances require this and more like right on, we're a hivemind where we sacrifice our first born and consume the remains of the fallen for nutrients to continue the colony. Ayy lmao. I guess the point I'm making is AAs strangely become like the people you know but at the same time don't at all. It's a strange reaction/effect that doesn't make any sense on paper. You won't get into a bar fight and back them up because they're so far out and strangers, but the same time you spend hours for a common goal.
  5. 4 points
    Hello! Glad to see you are considering the Black Knights to be your future alliance. Here is some more detailed information about all the great stuff we offer. Strong Community - We have a very strong, fun community. Even if the game gets boring, you'll always be having a good time at BK. Advancement Opportunities - We are still a smaller alliance (for now). That means there is more opportunity for you to move up the ranks, if that is something you want to do. Financial Incentives - Here at BK, we offer plenty of financial incentives to help you build up your nation. Here are some of the best ones. City Grants - We offer city grants (free money for you to use to buy cities) up to 20 cities. Entrance Aid - You will get free money just for joining. Loans - Low interest loans to help you keep buying them cities, or infrastructure, or whatever. Lottery - I don't know if gambling counts as a financial incentive, but hey, it is fun. BK Net - This is the system at the center of our alliance operations. It does tons of things, but here is some of the benefits it could give you right away. Bank Accounts - Don't want all your money sitting in your nation where it can get stolen? Here at BK, you can have your own bank account. The money is stored in the alliance bank, where it is much safer, and is accessible to you at any time. Deposits and withdrawals are automated, so you can do them at any time! Automated Grants and Loans - you won't have to make some forum post, or message a gov member, to request grants and loans here. That is all a click away with BK Net. Detailed nation information - BK Net can give you information about your nation that you couldn't even get in-game. One neat example is a graph of the money you've had in your nation over the past year. Hopefully we will see your application soon. And if you still have more questions, don't hesitate to message me on Discord or in-game.
  6. 4 points
    Yosodog

    Join BK...?

    Guess you aren't joining back then
  7. 4 points
    Jimmyvbuck

    Join BK...?

    Nobody gives a flying fuck if you rejoin or not. Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK Join BK
  8. 4 points
    LordStrum

    Join BK...?

    You've been on the shitlist since the day you left, so I don't see why you're taking this so hard.
  9. 3 points
    Ƭ̵̬̊

    Gods & Goddesses: Entry #1

    Note: I got bored and decided to cast various alliance members into roles in famous myths, fairy tales, bible stories, etc... it's a bit long so bear with me. Entry #1: The Juniper-Tree It was long ago, in a land that is no longer remembered or mentioned, that a man and his religious wife lived. The couple had wished for children for a very long time but, as if cursed, the wife's body refused to birth a child and their attempts had often resulted in stillbirths. It was due to this that the man's wife had taken to praying fanatically every night in hopes of being blessed and released from her woes through a healthy baby. One night, during her prayers, her finger had been nicked after slicing an apple. Unhappily, she watched as a drop of her blood sunk into the snow beneath her. "If only," she thought. "I could have a child as red as blood and as white as snow." Soon after, the wintry months passed and the lady grew sickly and pale. "If I die," she told her husband. "Please bury me underneath the Juniper-Tree." But, as luck would have it, she recovered after a few passing months and her stomach grew swollen and bloated. By the ninth month, a child who was as red as blood and white as snow appeared and, in her delight, she had died. Before she passed, however, she said one last thing. "Take care of my child for me, @Yosodog," she smiled. "His name shall be @LordStrum." Her loyal husband nodded and, as she went to meet her maker, he took her body and laid her to rest underneath the Juniper-Tree. "I shalt not fail you, @ViKy," he finally said, reminiscing over his wife. It wasn't much later that he grew lonely and, while still devoted to his departed wife and son, he took another wife. @Azoth was a lovely woman who near instantly bore him a child; a daughter to match his son. Azoth, although a kind and caring woman, couldn't stop thinking horrid and sinful thoughts every time she saw her stepson, LordStrum. She was filled with hatred as she thought of how little her daughter would receive and how spoiled and lazy the boy would become. One day, evil consumed her mind and she began to assault the poor child. LordStrum had no place with peace, in his school (the Black Knights Academy) where everyone chided him for his slothful nature, or at home where his step-mother abused him. His step-sister, @Justakittywithabox, was his only solace. Finally, however, Azoth was seemingly overtaken by the devil and placed many apples in a steel chest in the kitchen. As LordStrum came home, his step-mother sweetly spoke to him. "My dear son, would you care to have an apple?" she asked, her voice as saccharine as honey. LordStrum, being not only a slothful but a gluttonous boy, happily replied. He strolled over to the chest and reached inside. His body, being so small, forced him to place half his body and his head in the chest to reach further. Slam! Azoth held a menacing look in her eyes as LordStrum's head cut cleanly off and sat in the chest, blood indistinguishable from the apples. Suddenly fearful of her act, Azoth quickly fled the room, forgetting of her step-son's body. Horror was the only way to describe her expression as her daughter, Justakittywithabox, wandered into the room with distress. "Mother!" she called. "I went into the kitchen and saw LordStrum digging into the chest of apples. I had asked him for one but he didn't answer and, although I saw only his crooked back reaching in, he seemed awfully pale and silent," tears began to drip out of her eyes. "I approached him and shook his body but then his head fell off unto the chest! Mother, I had knocked my brother's head off!" she cried, dropping to her knees. Azoth seemed to be at lost but, at that moment, wicked thoughts haunted her once again. "Justakittywithabox, there's nothing we can do now. We must hide the evidence and make him into black-pudding." Yosodog came home soon after and asked, "where is my son?". Azoth, however, already prepared dinner and answered promptly. "He had gone to visit his uncle, @Curufinwe, across the country." "I feel awfully worried should something go wrong. He should've said goodbye to me first." With that he began to eat and said, "Justakittywithabox, why are you crying? Your brother will come back soon." His face contorted into something of a mixture of wonder and amazement and said, "Azoth, this is a spectacular dish you made! Get me some more!" And the more he ate the more he wanted to have, and he said, "Give me some more, you shall have none of it." And he ate and ate until he had finished the whole. But Justakittywithabox went to her room and took her silk handkerchief, and got all the bones from beneath the table, and tied them up in her silk handkerchief, and carried them outside the door, weeping tears of blood. Then she laid down under the juniper tree on the green grass, and after she had lain down there, she suddenly felt light-hearted and did not cry any more. Then the juniper tree began to stir itself, and the branches parted asunder, and moved together again, just as if someone were rejoicing and clapping his hands. At the same time a mist seemed to arise from the tree, and in the center of this mist it burned like a fire, and a beautiful bird flew out of the fire singing magnificently, and he flew high up in the air, and when he was gone, the juniper tree was just as it had been before, and the handkerchief with the bones was no longer there. Justakittywithabox, however, was as gay and happy as if her brother were still alive. And she went merrily into the house, and sat down to dinner and ate. But the bird flew away and lighted on a goldsmith's house, and began to sing - my mother she killed me, my father he ate me, my sister, little Justakittywithabox, gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. @Zoot was sitting in his workshop making a golden chain, when he heard the bird which was sitting singing on his roof, and very beautiful the song seemed to him. He stood up, but as he crossed the threshold he lost one of his slippers. But he went away right up the middle of the street with one shoe on and one sock, he had his apron on, and in one hand he had the golden chain and in the other the pincers, and the sun was shining brightly on the street. Then he went right on and stood still, and said to the bird, "Bird," said he then, "how beautifully you can sing. Sing me that piece again." "No," said LordStrum, "I never sing it twice for nothing. Give me the golden chain, and then I will sing it again for you." "There," said the goldsmith, "there is the golden chain for you, now sing me that song again."Then the bird came and took the golden chain in his right claw, and went and sat in front of the goldsmith, and sang - my mother she killed me, my father he ate me, my sister, little Justakittywithabox, gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. Then the bird flew away to a shoemaker, and lighted on his roof and sang - my mother she killed me, my father he ate me, my sister, little Justakittywithabox, gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. The shoemaker heard that and ran out of doors in his shirt sleeves, and looked up at his roof, and was forced to hold his hand before his eyes lest the sun should blind him. "Bird," said he, "how beautifully you can sing." Then he called in at his door, "Wife, just come outside, there is a bird, look at that bird, he certainly can sing." Then he called his daughter and children, and apprentices, boys and girls, and they all came up the street and looked at the bird and saw how beautiful he was, and what fine red and green feathers he had, and how like real gold his neck was, and how the eyes in his head shone like stars. "Bird," said the shoemaker, "now sing me that song again." "Nay," said LordStrum, "I do not sing twice for nothing, you must give me something." "Wife," said @Luis, "go to the garret, upon the top shelf there stands a pair of red shoes, bring them down." Then the wife went and brought the shoes. "There, bird," said Luis, "now sing me that piece again." Then the bird came and took the shoes in his left claw, and flew back on the roof, and sang - my mother she killed me, my father he ate me, my sister, little Justakittywithabox, gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. and when he had finished his song he flew away. In his right claw he had the chain and in his left the shoes, and he flew far away to a mill, and the mill went, klipp klapp, klipp klapp, klipp klapp, and in the mill sat twenty miller's men hewing a stone, and cutting, hick hack, hick hack, hick hack, and the mill went klipp klapp, klipp klapp'klipp klapp. Then the bird went and sat on a lime-tree which stood in front of the mill, and sang - my mother she killed me, my father he ate me, my sister, little Justakittywithabox, gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath, the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. @Erwin Rommel stopped his work and looked at LordStrum. "Bird," said he, "how beautifully you sing. Let me, too, hear that. Sing that once more for me." "Nay," said LordStrum, "I will not sing twice for nothing. Give me the millstone, and then I will sing it again." "Yes," said Rommel, "if it belonged to me only, you should have it." Then the bird came down, and the twenty millers all set to work with a beam and raised the stone up. And the bird stuck his neck through the hole, and put the stone on as if it were a collar, and flew on to the tree again, and sang - my mother she killed me, my father he ate me, my sister, little Justakittywithabox, gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. And when he had done singing, he spread his wings, and in his right claw he had the chain, and in his left the shoes, and round his neck the millstone, and he flew far away to his father's house. In the room sat the Yosodog, Azoth, and Justakittywithabox at dinner, and the Yosodog said, "How light-hearted I feel, how happy I am." "Nay," said the Azoth, "I feel so uneasy, just as if a heavy storm were coming." Justakittywithabox, however, sat weeping and weeping, and then came the bird flying, and as it seated itself on the roof Yosodog said, "Ah, I feel so truly happy, and the sun is shining so beautifully outside, I feel just as if I were about to see some old friend again." "Nay," said Azoth, "I feel so anxious, my teeth chatter, and I seem to have fire in my veins." And she tore her stays open, but Justakittywithabox sat in a corner crying, and held her plate before her eyes and cried till it was quite wet. Then the bird sat on the juniper tree, and sang - my mother she killed me, then the mother stopped her ears, and shut her eyes, and would not see or hear, but there was a roaring in her ears like the most violent storm, and her eyes burnt and flashed like lightning - my father he ate me, "Ah, Azoth," said Yosodog, "that is a beautiful bird. He sings so splendidly, and the sun shines so warm, and there is a smell just like cinnamon." My sister, little Justakittywithabox, then Justakittywithabox laid her head on her knees and wept without ceasing, but then Yosodog said, "I am going out, I must see the bird quite close." "Oh, don't go," said Azoth, "I feel as if the whole house were shaking and on fire." But Yosodog went out and looked at the bird. gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I On this LordStrum let the golden chain fall, and it fell exactly round the man's neck, and so exactly round it that it fitted beautifully. Then he went in and said, "just look what a fine bird that is, and what a handsome golden chain he has given me, and how pretty he is." But Azoth was terrified, and fell down on the floor in the room, and her cap fell off her head. Then sang the bird once more - my mother she killed me. "Would that I were a thousand feet beneath the earth so as not to hear that." My father he ate me, then the woman fell down again as if dead. My sister, little Justakittywithabox, "Ah," said Justakittywithabox, "I too will go out and see if the bird will give me anything," and she went out. Gathered together all my bones, tied them in a silken handkerchief, then he threw down the shoes to her. Laid them beneath the juniper tree, kywitt, kywitt, what a beautiful bird am I. Then she was light-hearted and joyous, and she put on the new red shoes, and danced and leaped into the house. "Ah," said she, "I was so sad when I went out and now I am so light-hearted, that is a splendid bird, he has given me a pair of red shoes." "Well," said Azoth, and sprang to her feet and her hair stood up like flames of fire, "I feel as if the world were coming to an end. I too, will go out and see if my heart feels lighter." And as she went out at the door, crash! LordStrum threw down the millstone on her head, and she was entirely crushed by it. Yosodog and Justakittywithabox heard what had happened and went out, and smoke, flames, and fire were rising from the place, and when that was over, there stood LordStrum and he took his father and Justakittywithabox by the hand, and all three were right glad, and they went into the house to dinner, and ate black-pudding.
  10. 3 points
    Jimmyvbuck

    Join BK...?

    The hostility here has nothing to do with him joining sparta, it has to do with him thinking we care that he comes back with his silly stupid threat of not coming back over a small thing like "join BK"... This is BK, either deal with it, or gtfo because saying "stop it or else" is not going to do anything other than make me hostile tbh.
  11. 3 points
    LordStrum

    The Great Black Knightian Empire (PART 1)

    BK origins set the bar high. don't disappoint
  12. 3 points
    Jackywho

    The Origins of BK (Part 1)

    Preface: In commemoration of BK's one year anniversary, I will be releasing a story detailing the origins of BK. None of it is actually factually accurate (you can find the history of BK here: http://politicsandwar.wikia.com/wiki/The_Black_Knights) and is written purely for the fun of it. My brain told me not to release it as there will be a high chance of me getting kicked from the alliance because of this, but hey, ayy lmao. There will be 5 parts altogether, and I will release 1 part every 12 hours-ish. The final 2 parts will be uploaded on the actual day of BK's bday party. Without further ado, here it is! PART 1 Emperor Manas sat on his throne, looking down on his only 2 subjects. Yoso the doge and LordStrum the Koreaboo stood before him. He sighed. How did the kingdom end up like this? Just mere months before the Kingdom of Peace and Butterflies stood strong, a role model for the barbaric nations that populated Orbis. It all changed when the Fire Nation attacked, destroying the kingdom like a hot knife through butter(flies). Now, all he is left with is Yoso and LordStrum, both close to useless pieces of shit. “My brethren” he spoke with a deep voice befitting that of an Emperor. “I am certain that you know as well as I that our Kingdom is in bad shape. This is why I must now… GOD DAMN IT STRUM WOULD YOU STOP THAT?!” LordStrum ceased his fapping and looked to his Emperor. “But my liege, I can’t help it. I’m simply irresistible.” he says as he whipped his long hair back like a shampoo commercial. “Look at me, I’m gorgeous!”, gently caressing his reflection in the mirror that he was fapping to. “Anyway… I am sending you both on a quest. We need men to rebuild our kingdom and revitalise our position within Orbis. Furthermore, you two will also come up with a new name for our Kingdom on your journey. The Kingdom of Peace and Butterflies simply does not pack the same punch it used to have.” “Such quest. Many exciting. Very honorable. Wow.” Yoso replied, bowing deeply before his Emperor. LordStrum gave a small bow, since he couldn’t bend that far while fapping. “Now go! Onwards! God speed! Adios! Have a safe flight! 一路顺风! GTFO! Get yo ass out of the door!” “Alright, alright, we get the message” LordStrum mumbles as he zips up his pants and exited the king’s private bathroom with Yoso. @manas @LordStrum @Yosodog
  13. 2 points
    Nyanro

    Visit Yoitz!

    More coming soon! If you'd like to travel to Yoitz, don't be shy - Nyanro is here to answer all your questions :3
  14. 2 points
    Greetings members of BK, and welcome to Format Police. A place where we can come together and discuss the bad formatting that happens from time to time in BK. The first thing that we will be discussing is Alliance Announcement Terrorism. Far too often do the nations of BK have to log into their nations to see an alliance announcement, only to open it and find that it contains a link to the forums that is in non-hyperlink format. Now let me just come out right now and say this, folks, a link that isn't a hyperlink just isn't a link. It would be like if I posted an image in all binary. Sure, it technically represents an image, but it just isn't an image and why the fuck did I do it? Now, unfortunately, this blog is the Format Police, not the Format Discussion Blog. So I can't just discuss this type of transgression, I must call out the Transgressor. In this case, it is none other than our Emperor, Curufinwe. Just recently, he submitted an alliance announcement titled "Eighth BK Senate Elections" which nothing up a "link" to a forum topic. Unfortunately, this link is nothing but plain text. How can our members trust us to lead the alliance if we can't even provide them with links to click? The Black Knights probably provides more general conveniences to its members than any other alliance out there. We have so many nice scripts and things for signing in, requesting grants and loans, etc. However we then cruelly force our members to COPY AND PASTE A LINK? Just because our in-game alliance HQ is located in Africa does not mean we have to act like we live there. We have hyperlinks here and we should use them. The Format Police is issuing ONE DEMERIT to @Curufinwe. Total demerits will be kept track of at the end of each blog post. If YOU see any formatting transgressions that deserve a demerit, please contact the Format Police immediately. Total Demerits Curufinwe: 1
  15. 2 points
    Turn back now if you don't want to see boobies. The long awaited sql to my best series ever, "The Quest for the Perfect Tits." You can view that thread here. First of all, let's get something out of the way. We in no way discriminate against fake tits. We're simply looking for the pair of tits. It doesn't matter whether or not nature created them or your favorite plastic surgeon, boobs are boobs. We're going to go ahead and take a look at one of the most famous Reddit girls, /u/exilevilify (she also went by unicornblood12). There are a ton of her pictures out there so here's a link to one of the best albums I could find of her. Let's start. This girl was truly bless and apparently, they're real. She posted some gif of her bouncing them around (which I can't find) and it seemed like they were real. However, I'm not expert at fake tits but I'm gonna believe these are real. Here's our first image. As you can see, perky, nipple coloration is amazing, and the nipple size is also right where it should be. She's not even supporting them up at all and they're still holding strong. Fake?????? Don't tell me that or I'll lose hope. Now here we get a bit different lighting. As you can see her tits are fairly veiny, which isn't horrible at all. However, it does deduct a point. Now before you call me a shallow ass hole, you have to remember that this is the quest for the perfect tits. PERFECT. Tits aren't all about just the tits, the surrounding area should also be great. Her body is really good, however it's not perfect. She doesn't have that great curves and she doesn't have that line going down the middle. Not sure what that's called... it's like in the middle of her abs and goes down to her belly button. Here's a full frontal of her body. You're definitely going for the boobs and not the body. Don't get me wrong, good body, but not perfect. Underboob and the camera isn't even under the boob? Yup, pretty good. They really look fake here, but I'm still holding on to hope. In fact, these look like completely different tits but I can assure you they're the same pair. Not a fan of the swimsuit, but I am a fan of the boobs. So let's get to our conclusion. I give this girl a 9.3/10 for her tits. They're perfectly perky, her nipple shape and color are pretty much perfect, though they're really veiny. Unfortunately, someone found out who this girl was and blackmailed her and she hasn't returned to reddit ever since. What a shame. rip in peace exilevilify. And to all the haters out there, fuck youuuuuu Stay tuned, next time we examine pretty good tits. Let's be real, you didn't read anything I typed smh
  16. 2 points
    There once were two men. No one knew who they were. Their names were Jimmy and Strum. Jimmy approached Strum in the scorching desert sun. "Hello traveler, I see that you are in desperate need of some water." Jimmy said with a wise cracked smile on his face. Strum felt that he could do anything himself, and was quite cocky and reserved. "No you dumbshit, I can do anything myself, I don't need your dirty water." Jimmy looked at Strum with a quizzical look. He was quite confused as to why this man in front of him was being such a dickhead. "Is something wrong?" Jimmy asked in a caring tone. "Fuck off, I don't want to talk to you." Strum said in the same rude manner as before. Jimmy put his hand on Strum's shoulder, and at first Strum flinched, but then he started crying. "Tell me what's wrong sonny." Jimmy said with the same gentle caring tone as before. "I have no place to live, I have no money, and I have no wife." Strum said while balling his eyes out, he tried to calm down but it didn't help. "Oh son, those don't matter. Come with me and I will show you the ways of the world. I will make you into a king. You will be loved and revered by most everyone, but you will also be despised and your image will be burned." Jimmy said in a menacing authoritative tone. "What do you mean?" The innocent young Strum questioned. He had wiped most of his tears away and was more curious than he was sad. Jimmy stretched out his hand towards Strum and said, "Come with me and I will make you become the thing that you have always dreamed of. Do you accept my proposal? I will only ask you once." Strum was conflicted. He wanted to have a wife to love, a shelter to reside in and enough money to survive, but the things this man was offering were too good to be true. He decided that anything would be better than his current situation. "Ok, I will go with you, under one condition." Strum said while holding his index finger up. "Yes, what is it?" Old man jimmy said. "You must find a woman for me." Strum said with a smirk on his young shimmering face. "You will have all the women that you can choose from when I have succeeded." Jimmy said, returning the warm smile to Strum. "Alright then, let's go." Strum said happily. Jimmy started walking through the desert and Strum followed. This is where their long journey began and no one knew what was in store for their futures, only time may tell.... TO BE CONTINUED
  17. 2 points
  18. 2 points
    Ƭ̵̬̊

    The Diplomacy: Entry #1

    This will be a new part of my blog/journal/diary dedicated to my experiences as a foreign diplomat for the $yndicate and Roz Wei! My first impression of Roz Wei is that they're a lovable bunch of xenophobic ayy-lmao haters and Donald Trump lovers. Literally all of them have a Donald Trump post / topic in the P&W official forum. They're not exactly active in the embassy but they're a strong, new alliance filled with people like the infamous Rozalia. They're followers of Divine Right and have a particular obsession for Chinese/Asian dynasties and emperors in contrast to our love for aliens and anime. On the other hand, the $yndicate has primarily two members I particularly adore (one of which I am having a pun-flirting competition with) named Wilhelm the Demented and the other guy who has the Cheshire Cat as his avatar. I envy them for their arcade and have spent more time trying to beat high scores (and succeeding in a game of Snake) against their members. I have proudly secured the #1 position of Snake for the Black Knights (brags, brags, brags). We should have an arcade. I might actually defect to the $yndicate purely for their '80s style arcade. They have cool dropbears as their mascots but aliens definitely beat them in the catchphrase and mascot categories. All in all, I'm loving my new job and I find myself frequenting their forums. TLDR: Roz Wei hates ayy lmao, the $yndicate has a cool arcade that we should have, and I love my job.
  19. 2 points
    Shifty Stranger

    Animorphs

    Science has gone 2 far m8
  20. 2 points
    Shifty Stranger

    Anime is Heresy

    Nuff said.
  21. 2 points
    LordStrum

    What Makes Boobies So Attractive?

    Fuck. We need to give this guy a Nobel Prize.
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