I just want to start this rant by saying that there are two types of social justice. There’s the social justice that I believe in, then there’s the wrong kind of social justice.
If you have a Facebook account (which you most likely do), you’ve probably come across pages like BuzzFeed and AJ+. If you enjoy these pages, stop reading now you panzee.
I’ve personally blocked these kinds of pages simply because they were spamming my feed and I was getting tired of their shit. Every time I stopped to look at one of their videos that seemed interesting, it went one of two ways. One way was me saying “Oh, I guess that’s an okay recipe.” The other way was “Who the fuck is running this page? This is trash.” I did you guys a favor and unblocked several pages in order to look up what they’re posting about these days. I can say with utmost certainty I was extremely disappointed. To sum up these pages, I’ll give you one single sentence, because just one sentence is enough for me to describe these pieces of shit. Here it goes: Pages full of anti-wite, anti-male, anti-trump, social justice warrior hippy dippy bullshit speckled with stupid quizzes, mediocre recipes and a bunch of hipster crap. BuzzFeed is a joke! AJ+ is a joke! Daily Mail is a joke! Diply is a joke! Offbeat is a joke! Fucking goddammit! I’m sick of seeing this shit because they cut videos in a way that makes politicians look bad, they manipulate everyone into thinking white males are garbage, their quizzes are written by morons, half their posts don’t mean a goddamn thing and their lists are so fucking redundant! Half of these pages consider themselves “news” when in reality it’s just an outlet for idiots and hipsters to band together and support the weak-minded shitfaces that are as easily entertained as 2-year-olds.
We’re being overrun by political correctness and shitty sources of entertainment! Not to mention that Canada has the most politically correct Prime Minister it's ever had who allowed M-103 to happen! Now it’s illegal for me to say that I have a problem with Islam as an organized religion! I have a fucking problem with every organized religion! There are so many holes in religion it looks like swiss fucking cheese!
Anyway, back to the matter at hand. I mentioned at the beginning of the rant that I believe in social justice. Yes, that’s true. I believe in equality between all people. I don’t specify any one sex or race, I simply hate everybody equally. Because everyone sucks, be it one way or another. I know I suck, but that’s why I’m better than a lot of people. I know my weaknesses. I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m an asshole. Look, I believe in that people run this world and people make money and money makes the world go ‘round. Sad to say it, but it’s true. If you have no money, you have close to no chance of being successful. That’s how this works. It’s been that way for a long time. Well, a long time relevant to the evolution of humans. The creation of currency fucked us over. And because I believe this, people call me pessimistic or a dick. But I’m getting off topic again.
I took a long look at the Daily Mail, a source of news that was once respectable. I’ll go ahead and read one of their headlines to you. “Megan Gale shares first pic of growing baby bump”. Not enough cringe for you? Okay. Here’s another. “Kim transforms into Virgin Mary for new kimoji (but fans aren’t happy)”. Oh, how about this piece of important news? “Kim Kardashian wriggles around in skimpy bikini in very sultry video”. “Popping out! Ireland Baldwin suffers nip slip in skimpy thong bikini”. I’m not making this shit up! This is real! This is what the Daily Mail is posting! You know what I have to say about this? Who the fuck cares?! Celebrity news isn’t news! It’s dumb gossip that should be kept off news pages! If the Daily Mail stopped posting this crap, they might turn out to be respectable again! I bet their motto is “Daily Mail: Where you can see Kim’s bikini next to an article of a police shooting”. Actually, that’s catchy. I like it. Someone do me a favor and contact the Daily Mail. I bet they’d like to hear feedback from me. Maybe I can be a writer for them. First article: “Fuck everyone. Everyone fucking sucks and I'm looking to get a quick paycheck for writing a shitty article”. Yep. I’d fit right in.
Well, I’m getting tired of writing about this shit, so I’ll just add one more thing in. Quizzes. Quizzes are the bane of my fucking existence. They’re poorly put together, they’re filled with ads, they’re a cheap way for pages to post on your page because people don’t know about privacy settings and restrictions, and they’re the dumbest thing since the song “Sugar, sugar” by the Archies. You can’t guess my age based on your dirt simple history questions. You can’t determine my education level based on what foods I eat. I don’t want to know what celebrity I look like. And I certainly don’t want to know what superhero I’d be based on my colour preference! Fuck! Fucking fuckers! How does this happen?! How does social media get this bad?! How are people entertained by this shit?! It’s just a bunch of failing writers and high school dropouts writing shitty articles and quizzes for a quick buck! They’re not talented! They’re not smart! They’re fucking flannel-lumberjack-wearing, smoothie-cocktail-drinking, gym-selfie-enthusiast fucks! Fuck this! What the fuck?!
Well, thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed me freaking the fuck out. Do you agree or disagree? Let me know. Cool, cya.